Is it putty or "pooty"?

It's been a long time since I've put up a post. Every time I've sat down to write one, I just didn't feel like I knew what to say because so much has happened (is happening) that I simply didn't know where to start. Blogger's block I guess. Anyhow…I'm back.

I've been in India now for just over 3 months. It's hard to believe because it actually feels like it's been much longer. Not in a negative way, but more so because I'm learning so much and still adjusting to the culture. I've settled into my apartment now and have taken care of a few essentials:

1.) Purchasing caulking and wall putty (which I've learned is pronounced wall "pooty" here). This is to seal all the cracks and holes in my apartment to keep the bugs from invading the inside. They're relentless little suckers. You might be thinking that I went to a one stop shop hardware store to pick up these items, but that is not the case. I first had to ask my co-workers where I could find caulking (they call it "sealant" here) and wall putty. Before they could tell me, I was asked a series of questions on why I was buying these items, whether I was scared of bugs, and why am I not hiring someone to do all these things for me. After this 20 minute conversation, they told me where to buy these things….want to know where? It's at the place next to the stationary shop on the road just before the main entrance of the market, near that one pole. Road signs here are not a big thing, so in order to get somewhere, you have to use landmarks and that's how most people give you directions. After some clarification, I went on my search and actually found the shop with the sealant and the caulking gun! You can imagine my delight when I found these two items. The shop unfortunately did not have the wall pooty, so I had to ask the shop owner where the wall pooty was. Do you want to know where that is? It's at the paint shop that's next to the fruit shop on the main street in the market. This is almost as bad as telling someone in Seattle to meet you at the Starbucks on the corner of the street. After some further clarification from the shop owner, I continued my search and yes…I did find the wall pooty at the paint shop near the fruit shop!

2.) Getting my landlord to come over and fix my leaky faucet that was attracting thirsty critters*

3.) Getting an exterminator to come over to spray the outside and inside of the apartment*

*These things might sound like a no brainer, but here, at least in my experience so far, it's hard to say if and when someone will show up, when they say they will.

Although these three things seem like the most simple of tasks back home in the US, as a foreigner in India in a small suburb, these types of accomplishments are like little gold nuggets here. Included in the gold nuggets category would be learning how to use public transportation and figuring how to get purified water delivered to your house.

I can say now that I'm getting the hang of living here, which has provided me a lot of comfort. I'm even used to all the little sounds my apartment makes (or the neighbors upstairs make) that used to freak me out.

But you know how everyone says that there's this honeymoon period when you first arrive in a country…well, I believe I'm past that part now. In between getting the hang of living here and learning about the culture, some of my frustrations about the culture are surfacing. I don't want to go into a full blown rant about my frustrations, so I'll just give you a few highlights of where some of my frustrations are coming from:

1.) When riding the bus here, women can only sit at the front of the bus. On some of the buses, the first three or four rows on the right side are where women sit. They are not supposed to sit anywhere else on the bus. On other buses, they get the front part of the bus. Imagine a bus being split into thirds, the women would get the first third of the bus. (As an FYI, every part of India is different, so not all areas of India are like this.)

2.) Having male friends or male relatives coming to stay at my apartment with me (unless it's my husband or unless they are accompanied by their wife) is not encouraged. It has the potential of jeopardizing my reputation at work, jeopardizing my work's reputation, among other types of covert actions that I might not know about but effect the environment around me (which in turn effects me).

3.) Overall how ultra conservative/sensitive it is here that even the most subtle of actions and words can have serious implications for you. The implications can be subtle or in your face, but most at least from my observations are subtle….a bit like an iceberg effect.

I do have other frustrations that are surfacing as well but the part I am struggling with the most right now is trying to find understanding in my frustrations. I'm searching for middle ground at the moment because I can feel my frustrations building a wall between me and my continued learning about the culture. I thankfully have made a handful of good friends here who I can confide in and who have provided support for me in ways that have prevented me from doing really stupid things or prevented me from continuing to do stupid things. This is in addition to humorous anecdotes which you can't get enough of here and background information that reminds me that India is made up of so many different cultures and languages that things are not always what they seem. So the struggle continues……but at least I can comfortably sleep on it with my "sealant" and wall "pooty" at hand.